There we have it. China is responsible for rapes in Haryana. Them and their aphrodisiac noodles. Bloody.
Looks like everybody has an opinion on why rapes happen and each new theory is more nonsensical than the previous one.
Now, one cannot expect anything better from the Khap panchayat. Even collectively they probably do not have the brains the Lord God gave a chicken. But still, declaring that child marriage will prevent rape, takes a lot of guts. Also crack. I guess the brilliant logic at work here is that it will restrict rape to just one, poor adolescent child per, umm, male. Because that poor adolescent child is of no consequence at all. And also because that is surely how a rapist’s mind works. Whatte heartwarming thought. We ought to find out if they conducted a survey among the Chutalas and Goyats of the state before coming to this mind-blowing conclusion. Truly. My mind has been blown. To pieces.
While I was still staggering under the immense weight of this fascinating declaration, the Godfather of all quotes arrived. "Rape is consensual in Haryana." There is nothing to do in times like these, except observe a moment of deep silence and send up a prayer for MLA saab's wife. No. Don't roll your eyes, you condescending creature. She is married to a man who thinks rape is consensual. She could do with a few prayers. Adam and Eve, are you listening? It's all your fault you know. You and the Chinese.
Is there no limit or cure to human stupidity? We take one step forward and then immediately run 50 steps back. Let's just grow some backbone, shall we? Men lech because they can. They rape because they can. They think it is okay to do so because we let them. Somebody go ask the Khap, why must we give rapists a readymade victim in the form of a wife? And was I stuffing myself with too much chowmein when domestic rapes and child marriages became legal? Stupidity is recurring, and how.
While we are on rhetorical questions, here is one more: Why must Mamta Banerjee talk? So rapes are the result of ‘free interaction’ between men and women, didi? Clearly, this woman did not eat enough badaam while growing up. Clearly nothing needs to make sense anymore to become a national issue. Clearly I now stand in immense danger of being declared a Maoist, get thrown into jail and enter Bigg Boss, season 7. Sigh.
Poda wonly.
Nuff said. Signing off till the next time something pisses me off. Men, try not to rape anyone till then. Okay? Okay. Thanksbaiii.
